Zimbabwe's Social Network

*Riley: Look. Fuck you. Fuck the plane you flew in on. Fuck them shoes. Fuck those socks with the belt on it. Fuck your gay ass fairy faggot accent. Fuck them cheap ass cigars. Fuck your yuckmouth teeth. Fuck your hairpiece. Fuck your chocolate. Fuck Guy Ritchie. Fuck Prince William. Fuck the Queen. This is America. My president is black and my Lambo is blue, nigga. Now get the Fuck out my hotel room, and if I see you on the street, I'm slapping the **** out of you.

Granddad: (turns away from the mirror) I know the game. Your grandaddy knows the game.
Riley: Game recognize game, Granddad.
Granddad: (gets in Riley's face) I recognize game. Your granddaddy recognize game.
Riley: Game recognize game, and you lookin' kinda unfamiliar right now. I... I can't... where's Granddad? Can I help you sir?
Granddad: (stares at Riley for a while) I ain't got time to mess around with y'all. I gotta date. Get out the way. (he walks off screen)

Kelly's lawyer: Would you describe yourself as an African American woman?
Victim: (giving testimony) Nigga you blind?
Kelly's lawyer: Heheh... No, I'm not. So it's safe to say that R. Kelly is... sexually attracted to black women, right?
Victim: Mmmhmm (she nods)
Tom: Objection — relevance.
Kelly's lawyer: Your honor I'm trying to establish to the court that my client is a proud black man who loves his black sistas. Unlike District Attorney Dubois... Who's married... to a WHITE WOMAN! (he points to Sara)
Audience: (gasps collectively)
Sara: (facepalms)
Tom: (visibly ruffled)
Mr. Dubois: Please, people, you saw the tape! The girl testified she was underage! You're not allowed... to do that... to a little girl! WE HAVE A VIDEOTAPE!
Black female juror: Go tell that to your white bitch.
Black female juror 2: Mmm hmm!

Uncle Ruckus: Thank God for the white man's code of law. That's the only thing that'll keep these uppity niggas in line. Well, that and pepper spray. You know I sat on a jury one time.
Robert: Really?
Uncle Ruckus: Oh yeah. It was in 1957 back in Tennessee. (narrating) Now the defendant was accused of shootin' three little white women with a Winchester rifle from about fifty yards away. See, now, he thought he was gon' get off on that old "I'm blind" excuse. But oh boy... he had another thing comin'.
Judge: The jury will now go off and deliberate on...
Uncle Ruckus: (interrupting, stands up) Guilty! That nigga is guilty!
Judge: (bangs gavel) Sir! Settle down. You have to go deliberate.
Uncle Ruckus: I don't need to deliberate. Hang that nigga now! I got the rope right here! (he holds up a noose